What Aged Care Nurses Wish Every Family Knew
It’s 2am. In a quiet corridor of an aged care home somewhere in Australia, a registered nurse is gently turning an 89-year-old woman in her sleep – to ease the pressure on her hip, to check her skin, to make sure she’s comfortable.
The woman doesn’t wake. The nurse murmurs her name softly anyway. “You’re alright, Joan. I’ve got you.”
There’s a particular kind of love that doesn’t make the news.
It happens at 2am. It happens with damp washcloths and warm hands. It happens in the small, unwitnessed acts of attention that families almost never see – but that quietly hold a person together in their final years.
This week, on International Nurses’ Day, a special event coordinated annually by the International Council of Nurses, and observed worldwide on Florence Nightingale’s birthday, much of the spotlight will fall on hospital nurses, emergency departments and the dramatic stories television loves to tell. Aged care nurses, as ever, will keep doing their work in the background.
They’re the unsung heroes of healthcare, championing the fight for the continuity of care we all need but sometimes forget to acknowledge. Today, and every day, we thank you, we celebrate you, we see you. Because behind every person who feels safe, cared for, and heard – there’s often a nurse who made that possible.
Why This Matters Right Now
Australia is in the middle of one of the biggest aged care transitions in a generation.
Support at Home, the Australian Government’s new aged care reform, replaced the former Home Care Packages (HCPs) system from 1 November 2025. The new Aged Care Act (2025) has reshaped rights and responsibilities, while the workforce is stretched. The funding intends to be more flexible, but it’s also more confusing – and most people are simply trying their best to navigate it.
In the midst of so much change, our nurses stand tall. Registered nurses (RNs), enrolled nurses (ENs) and assistants in nursing (AINs) – the three tiers of the Australian aged care nursing workforce, are the people who actually deliver care, day in and day out. They watch the small changes, they have the difficult conversations, and they keep your loved one safe when you can’t be there.
So when they tell us what would help them help the people we love, it’s worth listening.
1. Share Who You Used to Be
When a new Support at Home nurse visits you at home, all they know is a name, a date of birth, and your aged care assessment report.
What they don’t know, and desperately want to, is who this person standing in front of them is.
Were you a teacher? Did you run an auto shop? Did you raise five kids on your own? Did you serve overseas? Do you speak another language at home? And of course, seeing that photo on the bedside table… changes the whole room.
It’s that short story about who you were – the funny version, the proud version, the heart-of-you version – that deepens the connection and inevitably, caring, that your nurse provides. It’s worth saying this, people who’ve lost their short-term memory have not lost themselves. They’re still in there, and the more those who care for you know about you, the more dignified that care only becomes.
2. You Can Ask Anything: They’d Rather You Ask Than Worry
There’s something about a uniform that makes people feel they shouldn’t bother the person wearing it. But the likely truth is, anyone who’s a nurse picked this career for one reason: They want to help people.
So, don’t ever feel like you’re a burden. Knowledge is power, but it’s also the remedy for anxiety and fear, so if there’s something weighing on your mind – please ask it. Because trusted aged care nurses would rather you ask the awkward question than lie awake at 3am with it. Why is my appetite different this week? Is this bruise normal? What does this medication do? What should I do if this plan doesn’t work out?
It’s more valuable to have ten questions about hydration than one regret after a hospital admission. It’s our expectation that your aged care nurse would rather walk you through the wound dressing than have you panic when you see it; they’d rather explain the medication chart than have you stop a tablet because you didn’t understand it.
You’re not annoying anyone by asking, and you won’t sound silly or difficult – instead, you’re being proactive about your quality of care and your health, and that’s the most important part.
3. Nurses Often Notice the Small Things, So Tell Them What’s Normal (So They Know When It Isn’t)
Renowned aged care nurses are professional pattern-readers. They can spot the early hints of a UTI from across the room – a slightly different walk, a touch of confusion that wasn’t there yesterday, or even a flatness in your voice (the list goes on).
But detecting these changes is only possible when your nurse knows what’s normal for you (and what isn’t), which is why it helps to be as open, transparent and honest as possible.
You can tell your nurse what normal looks like for you – what’s your usual mood? Are you a chatty person or a quiet one? Do you like to take an afternoon nap? How much do you usually eat? Are you particular, easygoing, or ritualistic about routines? There are many things you could share about yourself in this manner, all of which, helps your nurse to identify your patterns and changes alike.
4. Loved Ones Visiting Matters More Than You Think
Many families ask us, especially when dementia is in the picture: “Did they even know I was there?”
We promise you this: Yes. Maybe not in the way they used to. Maybe not in a way that lands as memory. But the body remembers a familiar voice, and the nervous system softens when a known face sits beside them; the breathing slows, the shoulders drop.
There is now known research that consistent visits, music, touch, and shared presence, reduce agitation, improve sleep, and sustain emotional wellbeing in people with cognitive decline. We’ve written more about reducing the risks of dementia and what helps over time.
You being there matters. Even if you sit in silence. Even if they don’t know your name today, and even if it feels like nothing – it’s always something for the person you care about.
5. Don’t Apologise for the Hard Days, It’s Okay Not to Be Okay
Some visits are beautiful, and some are exhausting and quietly heartbreaking. And sometimes you leave the carpark crying, it’s hard. Life isn’t always a walk in the park, more days than not – it’s stressful and overwhelming.
We understand. We see the family member who arrives in the middle of a shift change and looks like they haven’t slept in a week. We see the daughter who’s been on calls all morning. We see the son who walked in three minutes after his father didn’t recognise him for the first time. We see the individual care recipient desperately seeking for help to look after themself, with no one around to help them – we see it, and we feel it.
You don’t need to perform, or put on a brave face. Whether you’re meeting with a Support at Home nurse yourself, or accompanying a loved one through their aged care journey, it’s okay not to be okay – and it’s okay to express how you’re really feeling. At the end of the day, we’re only human (and your nurse, given their day-to-day exposure to people from all walks of life, is bound to only understand and sympathise with this).
6. Be Transparent About Your Financial Situation, We Can Help You Find What’s Covered
Aged care is expensive. Most families don’t realise just how much of what they’re paying for out-of-pocket might already be covered through their loved one’s Support at Home plan or other government funding; whether that’s nursing visits, wound care, medication management, continence support, allied health (the list goes on).
Simply talk to your nurse, or to our dedicated Care Advisers here at CareAbout – we can gently walk you through what your funding actually covers; what’s included and what’s not. Alternatively, if you’re yet to apply for Support at Home funding, we can provide direction on how to apply for a My Aged Care (MAC) assessment.
Money is one of the most common reasons families burn out, scale back visits, or stretch beyond what they can sustain, and it doesn’t need to be that way. This is your life, and you have the right to receive the quality care you need to continue residing safely and independently at home.
A Special Message For the Nurses Reading This
Quietly, on the off chance some of you are reading: From all of our dedicated team here at CareAbout, we thank you.
For the 2am turns and the 7am medication rounds. For the families you’ve coached through the worst week of their lives. For the small dignities – the brushed hair, the warm towel, the gently pronounced name. For the way you carry your patients home in your heart and on your mind, and still come back the next day – there would be no version of dignified nor healthy ageing in Australia without you in it.
We see you, today on International Nurses’ Day, and every day – thank you.
How CareAbout Works Alongside Aged Care Nurses
At CareAbout, we don’t employ nurses, but everything we do depends on their work. When we help families find the right aged care provider, nursing quality is one of the first things we look at. Not as a box to tick, but because it’s the difference between care that’s sufficient and care that’s truly quality.
If you’re navigating the aged care journey on behalf of someone you love, or for yourself, please know – you are never alone in this journey. CareAbout only exists to support you in finding the quality Support at Home you need to continue this next chapter safely.
Should you need advice or guidance finding the right quality care for you, please call our friendly team (Mon – Fri, 9am – 5pm AEST) at 13 13 00.
